


Tie your heart to mine

by missjudge



Category: S.C.I.谜案集 | S.C.I. Mystery (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood, Case Fic, M/M, Missing Persons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-13
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-21 11:27:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30021066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missjudge/pseuds/missjudge
Summary: Zhan Yao has disappeared.
Relationships: Bái Yùtáng/Zhǎn Zhāo
Comments: 14
Kudos: 26





	1. Descensus Averno

**Author's Note:**

  * For [The_Sassiest_Trixster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Sassiest_Trixster/gifts).



> By night, love, tie your heart to mine, and the two  
> together in their sleep will defeat the darkness.
> 
> (Pablo Neruda, Love Sonnet 79)

The world went to hell on a Thursday.

Bai Yutong couldn’t even remember the reason for the fight he had with Zhan Yao that Sunday. It was probably something stupid, like whose turn it was to do the dishes, and yet it was all he was able to think about later.

They had silently glared at each other the whole drive to the airport, Zhan Yao hadn’t even looked back or said goodbye when he had gotten out of the car, hauling his suitcase through the lobby, his whole body tense, shoulders square, his steps determined. Bai Yutong had watched him until he vanished in the crowd and wished he wasn’t so stubborn. They both were. He loved his cat with all his heart, but living together didn’t always bring out the best in either of them.

Because of the nature of their parting he hadn’t been surprised when Zhan Yao hadn’t called from the hotel that evening, or any other evening that followed. Sad, yes, angry and hurt, but not surprised. He had spent the whole Monday hiding in his office, going over some cold cases a good enough reason not to examine his feelings to closely.

The following days hadn’t been any better and by Wednesday evening he had been determined to pick up Zhan Yao from the airport and apologise immediately, maybe cook his favourite food or take him to see a movie, anything to make things right again.

And then, nothing was right anymore.

On Thursday morning, the hotel Zhan Yao had stayed in called to let him know there had been a mix-up in the reservation and his credit card would be charged twice, but it had been handled and he would get a refund. He hadn’t really been listening to the explanations and apologies, until the caller mentioned she hadn’t been able to reach Zhan Yao this morning and therefore had called him, which made him pause. Slightly alarmed, he tried to make sense of that information. “You mean you called his room and he didn't answer?” “No,” she said in an apologising tone. “He has checked out yesterday evening and I couldn’t reach his mobile phone. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

Bai Yutong felt his stomach drop. “He was supposed to fly back today. Do you have any idea where he might have gone?”

“Sorry,” the clerk said. “He didn’t say, only left last night.”

“Let me call you back”, he said hastily and hung up. While he dialled Zhan Yao’s number from memory, his mind went through a million possible explanations. Maybe he was still mad and therefore hadn’t called? Maybe he had taken an earlier flight? But why wasn’t he home already, a voice in his mind whispered.

The call went straight to voicemail and Bai Yutong stared disbelievingly at his phone, his heart beating painfully slow in his chest.

After this he didn’t waste any more time. He informed the team that their resident professor had gone AWOL and set everyone to work: He called the hotel again to make sure Zhan Yao’s room would be sealed and treated as a crime scene, then had Zhao Fu find the next possible flight and Jiang Ling trace Zhan Yao’s phone – the former with success, the latter not so much, since it apparently had been turned off all week.

Pinching his nose, Bai Yutong muttered a curse, took a deep breath and addressed his team: “Alright, Wang Shao and Zhao Fu are with me. Jiang Ling, you work best behind your own desk, so you stay, Ma Han and the little one”, he nodded to Bai Chi, “will assist you. Call me immediately if you find anything useful.” The chorus of “Yes, Sir!” did nothing to ease his anxiety, but he smiled at them anyway and nodded. “Let’s go. Let’s find him.”

The flight didn’t take long, and when Wang Shao hailed a taxi, Bai Yutong’s mind was already busy making lists and sorting through facts. They arrived at the hotel shortly after noon and immediately went to work, first explaining his case to the – very helpful – manager, who promptly offered a suite to use as a headquarter as long as they would need it.

Searching Zhan Yao’s room wasn’t really enlightening. He hadn’t left anything when he checked out – Bai Yutong noticed he hadn’t even taken the small shampoo samples and his heart clenched in fond exasperation. His cat was honest to a fault, really. Sitting on the bed in the quiet, empty room, he ran a hand through his hair.

_Where are you, Cat?_

* * *

_Cold._

_He felt cold._

_It was a cold that didn’t feel normal, not like being outside on a chilly day or after taking a cold shower.  
It was odd, somehow, vibrating, like a living being, moving inside him. _

_He felt it in his soul, his heart, his bones._

_How curious, he thought._

* * *

Sighing, Bai Yutong took out his phone and scrolled through his contacts until he found what he was looking for. Bai Qintang answered after the first ring. “Any news?” He sighed. “No, it’s… He’s…” He trailed off and sighed again, pinching his nose. “This is a nightmare, jie.”

“You’re going to find him, Yutong. I have no doubts about your abilities.”

“Jie, it’s my fault. We haven't spoken in a week. If I hadn't--”

“Oh, shut it!” Bai Qintang blurted. “It’s not your fault and you know it. Stop pitying yourself and start being useful. He’s counting on you, so you need to get your shit together.” Bai Yutong winced at the tone, but knew she was right. He swallowed hard. “Thanks, sis, I’ll try.” He could hear her smile through the phone. “That’s my baby brother!” He rolled his eyes and hung up. Feeling slightly more optimistic, he stood up to gather his team, leading them to the reception desk.

The clerk, the one who had called Bai Yutong and was now very keen to help, remembered Zhan Yao leaving shortly after 8 p.m. the day before. He had given her a rather good tip and asked about a store where he could buy some provisions, which she had told him.

Bai Yutong decided to pay that store a visit. After flashing his badge into the manager’s face – and hoping she wouldn’t look closely enough to see he was from another city – she produced a security tape from the night before, leaving him and Zhao Fu in the cramped store room to watch it. Hunched over the tiny screen, he saw Zhan Yao walk into the store, dressed as impeccably as always, carrying the small black suitcase that had been his birthday gift last year. He vanished from the screen for a few minutes, only to reappear at one of the self-checkout registers, piling his items haphazardly on the surface. Bai Yutong couldn’t make out all of the things he bought, but he recognised a few water bottles, cans of soft drink, lots of chocolate bars and something that looked like a CD case. He frowned. What on earth had his cat been up to?

After Zhan Yao had left the frame with his suitcase and a shopping bag, Bai Yutong ended the recording and stood up. That had been only moderately helpful. Nodding to the manager, he and Zhao Fu left the store and returned to the hotel room to meet with Wang Shao.

Two hours and a lot of empty take-out boxes later, he sat at the low coffee table in his room, socked feet on the table, a coffee mug beside him. The chairs next to him were occupied by his remaining team members, whose faces showed the same feelings that Bai Yutong was sure were on his own as well: frustration, anxiety, exhaustion.

Checking the nearest airport had proved utterly unhelpful. Zhan Yao hadn’t booked or taken a flight there and he didn’t show up on any of the video tapes. It was still possible he had taken a flight from another airport a city over, but Bai Yutong didn’t find that plausible. Zhan Yao was a rational and patient person, he would simply wait for a flight if it was delayed. So, he hadn’t taken a plane. What he _had_ done, however, they could only speculate.

The only thing they were sure about was the shopping he had done before vanishing. And it didn’t make sense either. Why would his cat buy so much food? Shaking his head, he took a sip of coffee. Food. Music. He wouldn't have use for a CD, Bai Yutong pondered, because for all his old-fashioned antics, he didn't actually own a portable CD player. So, he had bought food he couldn't eat, and music he couldn't listen to, unless…

_Unless._

“I got it!”

Wang Shao almost dropped his coffee mug and Zhao Fu startled out of his seat at this outburst, both looking expectantly at him. “Got what?”, Zhao Fu asked.

“What the cat did. Ah, I could kick myself for not getting it sooner! It's so obvious!” The other men looked at each other and then back to their boss. “And…?”, Wang Shao prompted. “The food! The CD! It is so obvious now! He wouldn’t buy so much food for a flight when he couldn’t keep it anyway.” He looked at them, feeling almost giddy with hope.

“He rented a car.”


	2. Abandon All Hope

_Silence._

_That was what woke him up, eventually._

_Silence. It was never silent in the city._

_He felt it like a blanket around him, enclosing him, like soft snow and cold earth and he felt himself breathing it._

_It was never silent in the city._

_Where was he, then?_

* * *

The realisation that Zhan Yao had rented a car wasn’t as useful as Bai Yutong had first hoped, though. A quick research showed eight rentals in walking distance to the hotel. They wasted quite some time in a video conference with the whole team, trying to eliminate some of the possibilities, until Bai Chi actually had the right idea to find the ones accepting cash payments – Zhan Yao’s credit cards hadn’t been charged – and so narrowed it down to two.

Since it was almost evening, they decided to split up to cover more ground, Wang Shao and Zhao Fu trying the one closer to the hotel. Bai Yutong walked the short distance to the other company, thinking about his cat on the way. How he had looked at him in the car on their way to the airport, silent and hurt and seething with anger. How he had closed the car door behind him without so much as a word. How he had walked away. In hindsight, their fight seemed so ridiculous and not for the first time that day he wanted to kick himself for being so stubborn.

_Kitty, I’m so sorry._

His mood didn't improve at all when he found the assistant at the car rental utterly unhelpful and downright rude in his refusal to give him any information. No, he couldn't give any customer details to anyone, no, not even to a police officer, no, not even when it concerns a missing person. Come back with something official, he had said, and it had taken all of Bai Yutong's self-control not to do something violent. He had walked outside the office for a minute to try and calm down, when his phone rang. Before he could ask anything, Zhao Fu blurted, “We got him! Boss, we got him, come over here!” Without a glance back, he turned into the direction his team had gone and started running.

He didn't expect them to have actually found his cat, not really, but he still couldn't suppress a slight twinge in his stomach when he arrived to find only Wang Shao and Zhao Fu with the assistant. Still, he nodded his approval to them when they explained what they had discovered: Zhan Yao had been here a day ago, with his suitcase and shopping bag. The boy behind the counter distinctly remembered how good-looking he was and how odd he had found it that someone wore a suit so late at night, and that the visitor had in fact asked for a car, paying in cash. Bai Yutong stared at the signature on the rental agreement and had to bite his bottom lip to fight back tears. A white Ford Mustang. His heart gave a painful thud. _What did you want to prove, Cat?_

The boy also recalled that Zhan Yao had asked for a map, which he found odd, since “Nobody uses them when they got a phone, right?” Yeah, well, Bai Yutong thought, apart from the fact that his cat probably hadn't wanted to turn on his phone, he still had a general dislike for being dependent on any kind of technology. So, a map made a lot of sense. Sighing, he thanked the assistant and turned to his team. “We might have a lead here, but unfortunately it’s too late to do anything today, so let’s continue tomorrow. We know he took a car and we know he used a map, it shouldn’t be that hard to find out where he went.” Wang Shao and Zhao Fu both nodded, looking tired and deflated, and the three turned back to the hotel room to catch some sleep.

Alone in his bed, Bai Yutong couldn't fall asleep, tossing and turning. He was bone-tired and mentally exhausted as well, but every time he closed his eyes, he saw Zhan Yao disappear into the crowd at the airport, his black suitcase trailing behind him, not turning back.

_I’m sorry, Cat. I’m so sorry._

* * *

Bai Yutong deeply regretted having been so outwardly optimistic the previous evening. It turned out to be quite troublesome to actually trace Zhan Yao’s steps, because of course the cat hadn't done anything remotely expectable.

After pouring over the map for what felt like an hour, they decided on no less than four possible routes he could have taken. Jiang Ling had been vaguely hopeful when he had asked her to check all toll-gates and traffic cameras she could find for the white Ford Mustang, but unfortunately she had come up empty. Zhan Yao hadn't taken either of the highways. That left them with two more potential routes, one alongside the sea, one leading through open terrain with no city for hours.

Bai Yutong sighed and pinched his nose, feeling the stress of the past days cumulating in his brain into the early onsets of a migraine. He looked at Wang Shao and Zhao Fu and sighed again, finding them staring blankly at the table where they had piled maps, receipts and notes – breadcrumbs in the woods.

“Alright, guys.” He exhaled slowly. “Let’s go over what we have again.” The two men groaned, but complied nonetheless.

“He has left the hotel at eight Wednesday evening,” Zhao Fu began. “Then went to a supermarket to buy some provisions.”

Wang Shao nodded and continued. “Yeah, then he walked to the car rental to get that car and a map.”

Bai Yutong raised a hand. “Wait. You said ‘that’ car. Not ‘a’ car.” Wang Shao looked confused. “I didn't mean anyth--” he started, but Bai Yutong interrupted him. “Where is the post-it with the rental guy’s phone number?” After some frantic digging, Zhao Fu wordlessly handed it over, looking expectantly at his boss. Bai Yutong shook his head and dialled the number. When someone answered, he didn't even bother to introduce himself: “Did he ask for that car specifically?”

“Uhhh, what? Who… what?”

He rolled his eyes, barely able to tamp down his impatience. “The guy who rented the white Mustang. Did he ask for that car specifically?”

The line was silent for a moment, then: “Kinda. He wanted a white muscle car, that was the closest I could get him in such a short time.”

“Thank you,” Bai Yutong managed, and hung up. He met his team’s gazes and exhaled.

“He asked for the car.” He felt almost giddy with new hope, the headache gone for now. That could be the break-through they needed.

“Boss, I still don't get why that is important,” Wang Shao sounded almost petulant and Bai Yutong had to suppress the urge to glower at him. Summoning his patience, he turned to his colleague: “It is important, because he would never in his life drive such a car. He always made fun of mine, and sometimes refused to be driven to university in it.” He looked imploringly at his team. They must understand the significance of this, didn't they?

Apparently they didn't.

“….and?” Zhao Fu asked carefully when he didn't continue.

“And,” Bai Yutong said, exasperated, “he wouldn't rent such a car. _I_ would.”

* * *

Explaining the significance of this revelation to the rest of the team had taken more time than he had anticipated – they really had needed some convincing – and now he felt more and more anxious by the minute. It was almost noon and he had the gnawing feeling that he needed to find his cat as soon as possible.

“The fact that he chose that kind of car tells me something,” he continued his explanations. “He wanted a white muscle car because that is what I would have chosen, so it’s only logical that all other decisions he made have something to do with me.” He looked at his laptop screen where he was met with sceptical gazes, but nobody said anything. “So, if I had this car and was faced with the two routes we have,” he nodded in the direction of the table, “I would take the one that leads cross country. A car like this needs vastness,” he added.

“So we need to check the roads there if anyone has noticed that flashy car,” Ma Han said, her voice sounding slightly distorted through the speakers. “How are we going to do that?”

“You are not,” Bai Yutong answered. “There are no traffic cams on smaller roads and no toll-gates, he didn't pay with credit card, so we don't have a trail of any kind.” He sighed. “We have to drive down that road and look out for him. Maybe he stayed at a motel or something.” _Or he had an accident_ , a voice in his head supplied, and he closed his eyes to force this thought away. “That car shouldn’t be hard to find.”

He really needed to be more careful with his optimism, Bai Yutong thought, discontented. As it turned out, the car _was_ indeed hard to find.

Obtaining a rental car of their own hadn't been the problem: He had marched up to the same place they had been the day before and asked for – well, Zhao Fu said demanded, but what did he know – a fast and reliable car. The assistant had happily obliged when he saw the black credit card Bai Yutong had waved in front of his face and given them a BMW. He had decided to have Wang Shao stay in their hotel suite to man the laptops in case they needed anything, and so it was just him and Zhao Fu on their road trip. He was grateful for the other’s, albeit silent, company, because being alone with his own thoughts probably wouldn't have been very wise.

With his co-driver reading the map, he had quickly found the correct cross roads. After a while, the landscape opened and got flatter, letting them see for miles and miles ahead. Meeting no traffic at all, it was easy to give into the temptation and let the car show its potential. But all the joy of being behind the wheel of such a beauty couldn't help the growing dread in his stomach. His heart was pounding harder with every mile marker they passed, his stomach twisting painfully.

_Kitty. Where are you?_

* * *

_After the cold and the silence, he noticed another sensation creeping into his consciousness, slow and unrelenting like molten lava._

_Pain._

_Like the times before, this pain didn't feel normal._

_It felt searing and burning and for a moment he wondered how he had ever felt cold with this flame inside him._

_Then the lava reached him and he didn't think at all._

* * *

After more than four hours behind the wheel with no results to show for it, Bai Yutong slowed the car down and came to a stop at the side of the road. Sighing, he turned to Zhao Fu. “I forgot that there are literally no towns on this route,” he said unhappily. “If he really took that road, he must have gone all night, don't you think?” The other gave him a cautious look. “He has an almost thirty-six hour head start,” he began. “Boss, I don't think we can catch up. If he had stayed over night, maybe, but there’s nothing here.” He gestured to the empty plane around them as if to demonstrate that he was right, and Bai Yutong felt his heart sink.

 _Zhao Fu is right_ , he thought. _We can't catch up, we won’t find him, we… No. No no no no. Focus._

“Alright, let’s return to the hotel and regroup,” he said with a knot in his stomach. “Can you drive back?” The other nodded quietly.


	3. Red Sky At Morning

Arriving at the hotel room made Bai Yutong feel like returning from a lost war. Wang Shao, uncharacteristically, didn't say anything, and for that he was endlessly grateful. He just nodded wordlessly to both of them and went to his own room, closing the door behind him. Sitting on the bed, he just stared at the wall, his heart pounding in the eerie silence.

_I failed, Kitty. I failed you. You need me and I can't get to you_.

He wiped his face, not quite able to hold back his tears. _Give me a sign, Cat. Please, anything. I need your help._

Again he had to think about the last time he had seen Zhan Yao. The silent car ride, the airport. The fight before that. He still couldn't remember what they had been fighting about, but it felt so meaningless now. Groaning, he hid his face in his hands.

Now, in the silent room he couldn't suppress the thought any longer that had been lurking at the corners of his mind all day: What if this was the last time he had seen him alive? What if he was dead, had died in a car accident somewhere on that endless road?

Rationally, he knew there were not many reasons why Zhan Yao would disappear. They had ruled out kidnapping quickly, simply because nobody had made any demands and also because his car had vanished with him. So, there was only one other explanation why Zhan Yao wouldn't react to calls and messages, and he wasn't ready to face that particular abyss yet.

_I can't lose him. Please. Not now. Not like this._

It was ironic, really, because in all his time working for the police, he had always accepted the possibility that he wouldn't return home one day, and he’d been okay with it. What he hadn't considered was that he might be the one left behind, and that thought made his blood freeze.

Feeling numb, he managed to shed his shirt and pants, but didn't bother with the rest as he crawled into bed, trying to hide from the world.

* * *

After what felt like hours of staring at the ceiling, he admitted defeat and stood up. Carelessly throwing on the clothes he had discarded just a while ago, he quietly left the suite and headed for the parking garage. He had paid for that car for a few days, so he figured he could as well make use of it. Fighting the urge to let the engine roar as he rolled from the parking spot, he left the hotel grounds and took the road out of town once more. When the city lights turned pale in the rear mirror, he accelerated, gripping the steering wheel tightly. Pressed into his seat, he saw the dark landscape fly pass him, the only light source the car’s bright headlights in the black void around him. He felt unreal and out of place in the silence and darkness, as if he didn't have a right to disturb the quiet night around him. Gritting his teeth, he stepped on the gas pedal.

After another hour he felt slightly calmer and let the car slow down. He felt like as if he had just awoken from a dream and blinked a few times, his brain still on autopilot. Glancing at the dashboard, he realised he would have to refill the gas before he returned the car in the morning. Sighing, he turned around and back to the city. As the illuminated skyline slowly came into view, he saw a gas station in one of the dark suburbs, neon lights announcing warm food. He took the next exit.

The teenager behind the counter gave him a strange look, and Bai Yutong suddenly felt very self-conscious. He hadn't showered in two days, his hair probably looked like a bird’s nest and his suit...well. Pointedly ignoring his red ears, he walked to the counter to pay for his gas.

“That’s a nice car,” he heard the boy say, and looked up curiously. His eyes shining, the clerk turned back to his customer. “It’s a BMW, isn't it? How fast can it go?”

Bai Yutong had to smother a small grin a the enthusiasm. “I didn't bring her to her limit,” he answered, “but on the road here she made probably 200. Felt pretty good,” he winked.

The boy grinned. “I bet. You look like someone who appreciates driving such a beauty.” He gave him a look. “If I could afford such a car, I wouldn't go anywhere else, just drive around the city,” he said excitedly. “Really, some people don't deserve nice things.”

Bai Yutong laughed, handing over his credit card.

“No, I’m serious,” the boy insisted. “Some days ago I had a customer who didn't even know what kind of car he was driving. He said it was a rental. A rental! That’s not a brand.” He huffed. “And it was such a beauty, really, a white Mustang.”

Bai Yutong suddenly had the feeling that the room didn't contain any more oxygen. His knees turning to jello, he had to hold onto the counter to steady himself. “A... A what?” he wheezed. The boy looked at him suspiciously. “A white Ford Mustang. And the guy driving it was totally oblivious, he wanted to take the scenic route, the one over the cliffs, when everyone knows that you need space for such a--”

Bai Yutong snatched his credit card from the boy’s hand and was out the door in a heartbeat. The scenic route. Of course. He was such an idiot.

* * *

_The pain had subsided a while ago, which was good._

_But now he felt cold again, and the silence began to hurt his ears._

_No, his head. His head hurt._

_He felt the cold in his heart and the silence in his head._

_It didn't feel good, and he wished for…. For……_

* * *

The scenic route, Bai Yutong thought, didn't really deserve that name, although that could have been due to the prevailing darkness. It was now four in the morning and he couldn't see anything beyond his car’s headlights. Why on earth had he thought Zhan Yao had taken the cross country route? Now it seemed so obvious: his cat loved the ocean, he loved the sunset, and he would have jumped at the opportunity to see either. He didn't know what to do with a sports car, didn't care for speed. Bai Yutong groaned again and accelerated further. He was such an idiot.

The road led him along some very steep cliffs – he could see some tiny lights very far beneath and had to focus on the road again as to not veer over the edge – and slowly uphill, forcing him into stretched serpentines. Reaching the crest, he stopped at the side of the road. Just a finger’s breadth over the horizon, he could make out a pale red glimmer. Mesmerised, he turned towards the sunrise. Watching the sun slowly appear above the waves, he felt oddly at peace and hopeful. _It will be alright_ , he heard his sister’s voice, full of grinning optimism. _It will be alright._

When the sun had risen fully, he turned away from the fiery spectacle back to his car, intent on continuing his search, when he suddenly had to squint. Something had blinded him briefly, something reflecting the sunlight from behind him. He raised a hand to his eyes to look for the source. There, a short distance away, he saw some sturdy pines defiantly clinging to the slope, and behind the trees…

His heart stopped.

A white car, badly damaged, almost hidden under foliage.

* * *

Later, he couldn't even remember how he had managed to get to the car and get Zhan Yao out without moving either of them too much. The car’s white leather seats were dark with blood, his cat slumped over the steering wheel, not moving. He wasn't conscious, but Bai Yutong hadn't expected him to be after seeing the state of the car. He shrugged out of his suit jacket and gently placed his cat on top of it, pressing the shirt he had discarded as well to the head wound that had started bleeding again. With his free hand, he put his phone on speaker and made the emergency call.

He didn't allow himself to pause, his frantic mind hyper-focused on Zhan Yao, knowing that he would shatter as soon as he did.

The next hour passed in a blur of questions, examinations, and hectic activity. He dimly noticed someone talking to him, but he just stubbornly shook his head and remained at Zhan Yao’s side, first in the ambulance, then in the hospital. He only came to again when a nurse shooed him away to sit in the lobby. Swaying on his feet, he found an empty seat and collapsed on it. 

He must have fallen asleep for a moment, because he startled at the voices of Wang Shao and Zhao Fu, calling his name. He didn't remember calling them, but apparently someone had, since they crowded him as soon as they spotted him. It took him a while to find his voice.

“He has a nasty head wound, and probably some broken ribs, I couldn't see more when I…” He inhaled shakily, feeling the stress of the last days finally taking its toll, making his mind fuzzy. “There was a lot of blood, but I think that’s from the head wound. I’m waiting for someone to tell me more,” he finished, shrugging, then letting his head fall back against the seat. He was so tired.

He startled again when someone said his name. Sitting up, he met the concerned gaze of a nurse, a surgical nurse, he registered. Belatedly he nodded, opening his mouth to ask about his cat. The nurse interrupted him. “He is fine for now. He has a fractured skull and four cracked ribs, as well as a broken wrist.” Bai Yutong exhaled slowly, only then realising he had been holding his breath. The nurse smiled. “The doctor will have a few questions, but for now you can see the patient, if you want to.” He was on his feet in a heartbeat, and slightly proud of himself that he didn't sway.

* * *

Zhan Yao looked so fragile in that hospital bed that Bai Yutong had to swallow hard and fight back tears once again. His head was bandaged as well as his left wrist, an infusion needle in the other arm. Carefully, Bai Yutong lowered himself to the edge of the bed.

“Kitty,” he began, but had to clear his throat. His voice sounded hoarse and raw and he felt very close to breaking. “Cat, I’m sorry it took me so long.” He wiped his face, pressing his eyes close to hold back the tears. “I’m so, so sorry. If I hadn't been such an idiot.. It’s my fault, Cat, it’s all my fault.” His voice breaking, he leaned over Zhan Yao, buried his face in the other’s shoulder, and, finally, cried.

He awoke to someone stroking his hair and needed a minute to process the feeling. When it all came back, he jerked his head upwards. Zhan Yao looked at him, smiling a lopsided smile, and that was enough to break him a second time. He couldn't do anything else than to lean against his cat again and sob uncontrollably into his shoulder. Zhan Yao continued to pet his hair soothingly, and after a while he felt himself calm down. Looking up again, he met the other’s gaze. Zhan Yao smiled that wry smile again and he felt something in his heart click back into place. He raised a hand to gently cup the other’s cheek.

“Cat, I’m so sorry,” he began, but Zhan Yao just shook his head, careful not to dislodge the hand on his face. “No, Mouse, I am sorry. I should have called, I was being childish. I turned off my phone so you wouldn't call me, I figured that is why you couldn't find me.”

Bai Yutong felt new tears well up at the words. “What? No, it’s my fault it took so long! I failed you, Cat,” he said gravely, and the other frowned at him. Feeling a hand under his chin, Bai Yutong looked up. “Mouse,” the other said with emphasis, “you were the one who found me. The doctor was here when you were asleep and he said you pulled me out of the car.” He frowned again and Bai Yutong swallowed his protest. “You saved me, Mouse. And you don't get to diminish that success because it took a while.”

“But—”

“No but. I made a mistake, you saved me, end of discussion.” He cocked an eyebrow. “Are you going to kiss me some time soon or do I have to--” Bai Yutong didn't let him finish that question.

* * *

“Cat?”

“Mhm.”

“I have a question.”

Zhan Yao turned his head slightly to look at him, the short distance between their faces making him almost look cross-eyed. “Ask.”

The other snuggled closer. “A white Mustang?”

Zhan Yao snorted. “Honestly? That was a spontaneous idea. I had been thinking about you all day and I wanted to be home as soon as possible, to apologise, by the way, and then he asked if I wanted a specific car. Well, I have no idea what you drive, or else I would have said that, probably, but then he gave me the Mustang and I figured, well, at least I’ll be fast.” Bai Yutong pulled back to look at him incredulously. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, then shook his head in defeat and settled back down on the other’s shoulder. Zhan Yao laughed at him and pressed a kiss to his hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a surge of inspiration and finished this in half a day. That has never happened before and I'm pretty sure it won't happen ever again, but who am I to complain.  
> I blame The_Sassiest_Trixster, your first ask started it and the last one ~~guilt-tripped~~ motivated me enough to tackle this beast. 😁 So, thank you very much 😁😁


End file.
